Just sitting down and writing this has been hard. I know I don’t have a particular habit of writing on this blog yet but I hope to.
Getting out your pain is hard. It has so many dynamics. I’m writing this for all of you who I know have pain that you feel that you can’t get out and talk about because people will judge you. I’m also writing this because its something I am struggling with. I have many friends who are very important to me who are also struggling because they are afraid of being judged and it making everything worse. Best to just keep it to themselves and “die on the inside” no?
Yeah no. You have to get all of that out. Is there an easy answer? Nope.
Is it really hard? Yeah. I’m writing this not to provide some 30 minute this will solve all your problem guide. This blog isn’t that at all. This isn’t “Blackright’s solutions”. Its Blackright’s thoughts.
I have things I’m afraid to tell anyone still. Afraid that it’ll all come crashing down. Or that I’ll just be piling more of my failures on top of the ones I have already admitted to, that people will be just done with me.
I have a very good friend who’s very important to me who is very afraid to admit things that they are struggling with. They are afraid of being judged. I understand that so so so much. My goal is to create a judge free zone. Not by kicking out the people who judge others but by guiding them to understanding that they don’t have to.
I do my best to never judge other people. I fail a lot. But it is my goal. With it being my goal I’ll get as close as is humanly possible.
Ranting is by far one of the most common ways people get out their pain. They get worked up and there it all comes out like a dam just broke. Then afterwards they are scared half to death that everyone will then hate them. I look at these situations. I feel very bad for those going through a hard time. I’m so very proud of them when they decide to tell everyone. I see those that judge them. I look at them and I feel bad for them. That they are going through a hard time and feel the need to put others in pain.
A lot of people just decide to never ever get anything out. I don’t think this is the answer. But then what is the answer people ask. To be honest I’m still trying to find out myself.
If I had to choose an option to stick with and go with I would say getting it out. But you have to get it all out. Gather those that need to know together and just tell them all. If they judge you they judge you. Maybe you don’t really want to be friends with them. If they are judging you because you have judged them then that’s your fault. You should apologize.